Maybe I've moved to the dark side, but it's clean and nice and we neve…

Jen Lancaster
36 citations
Maybe I've moved to the dark side, but it's clean and nice and we never run out of toilet paper. ✨ Jen Lancaster (2012). Jeneration X: One Reluctant Adult's Attempt to Unarrest Her Arrested Development; Or, Why It's Never Too Late for Her Dumb Ass to Learn Why Froot Loops Are Not for Dinner, p.13, Penguin
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No, it's not a 'corpse thing.' I feel I lack the emotional capacity to deal with those in mourning. ✨ Jen Lancaster (2006). Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self- … ▶
Ambien might have mentally just tossed my salad. WITH CROUTONS. ✨ Jen Lancaster (2010). My Fair Lazy: One Reality Television Addict's Attempt to Discover If Not Being A Dumb Ass Is t he New Black; Or … ▶
Fletch then kisses me on the forehead before opening the cabinet under the coffeemaker to grab placemats and napkins. Retrieving these items is his job because I kind of don't like to bend. I also re … ▶
The best thing about being 45 is not taking myself so seriously. Do I miss the package I came in at 25? I do. Gravity is no one's friend. Yet the perspective I've gained is so worth the wear and tear … ▶
You know what it was like? It was like thinking I was heading to a surprise party and instead it was a surprise pap smear. ✨ Jen Lancaster (2008). Such a Pretty Fat: One Narcissist's Quest To Discove … ▶

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