There's some invisible guy, up in the sky, who can kill you, because he loves you.
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- The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. God has a three-day weekend.
- There will be a rain dance Friday night, weather permitting!
- What year did Jesus think it was? β¨ George Carlin (1998). Brain Droppings, Hyperion
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- The Muslims observe their Sabbath on Friday, the Jews observe on Saturday, and the Christians on Sunday. By the time Monday rolls around God is completely f***in' worn out.
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