A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get mo…

George Carlin
484 citations
A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. ✨ George Carlin (2015). 3 x Carlin: An Orgy of George including Brain Droppings, Napalm and Silly Putty, and When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?, p.43, Hachette UK
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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? ✨ Carlin on Campus. Documentary, Comedy, 1984.
I never eat sushi. I have trouble eating things that are merely unconscious.
The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post “Thou shalt not steal,” “Thou shalt not commit adultery,” and “Thou shalt not lie” in a building full of lawye … ▶
One great thing about getting old is that you can get out of all sorts of social obligations just by saying you're too tired. ✨ It's Bad for Ya. Comedy album by George Carlin, 2008.
If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right … ▶

A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. ✨ George Carlin (2015). 3 x Carlin: An Orgy of George including Brain Droppings, Napalm and Silly Putty, and When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?, p.43, Hachette UK

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