Headbangers' are people who like heavy-metal music, which is performed…

Dave Barry
358 citations
Headbangers' are people who like heavy-metal music, which is performed by skinny men with huge hair who stomp around the stage, striking their instruments and shrieking angrily, apparently because somebody has stolen all their shirts. ✨ Dave Barry (2010). Dave Barry Is Not Making This Up, p.244, Ballantine Books
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Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. ✨ Dave Barry (2009). Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus, p.104, Ballantine Books
The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins.
And so by the fifteenth century, on October 8, the Europeans were looking for a new place to try to get to, and they came up with a new concept: the West. ✨ Dave Barry (2010). Dave Barry Slept Here: … ▶
I have a friend named Doris who argues, on good authority, that the single biggest cause of global warming is menopause.

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