Right, I breast feed baby camels in my backyard just for the freaking …

David Sedaris
191 citations
Right, I breast feed baby camels in my backyard just for the freaking fun of it. Just tell me where you live, Pinocchio, and save the baloney for lunch. ✨ David Sedaris (2010). Naked, p.94, Hachette UK
Humanity
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College is the best thing that can ever happen to you, my father used to say, and he was right, for it was there that I discovered drugs, drinking, and smoking.
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A good [short story] would take me out of myself and then stuff me back in, outsized, now, and uneasy with the fit. ✨ David Sedaris (2010). Children Playing Before a Statue of Hercules, p.13, Simon a … ▶
Hugh consoled me, saying, Don't let it get to you. There are plenty of things you're good at. When asked for some examples, he listed vacuuming and naming stuffed animals. He says he can probably com … ▶
The word 'phobic' has its place when properly used, but lately it's been declawed by the pompous insistence that most animosity is based upon fear rather than loathing. ✨ David Sedaris (2000). Me tal … ▶

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