Dogs would make totally incompetent criminals. If you could somehow ge…

Dave Barry
358 citations
Dogs would make totally incompetent criminals. If you could somehow get a group of dogs to understand the concept of the Kennedy assassination, they would all immediately confess to it. Whereas you'll never see a cat display any kind of guilty behavior, despite the fact that several cats were seen in Dallas on the grassy knoll area, not that I wish to start rumors.
Truth
28

More Author Quotes

Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary to what you may have heard, the Internet does not operate at the speed of light; … ▶
What happens if a big asteroid hits Earth ? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad.
I become faint and nauseous during even very minor medical procedures, such as making an appointment by phone. ✨ Dave Barry (2010). I'll Mature When I'm Dead: Dave Barry's Amazing Tales of Adulthood, … ▶
A critical function that we journalists perform at political conventions is to try to get into parties that we have not been invited to. There are dozens of these parties, sponsored by large corporat … ▶
And that's the wonderful thing about family travel: it provides you with experiences that will remain locked forever in the scar tissue of your mind. ✨ Dave Barry (2010). Dave Barry's Only Travel Gui … ▶

More Author Quotes

Most Cited Authors

The Best Quotes

Most Liked Authors

Curated Author Quotes