Carl HiaasenThe Florida in my novels is not as seedy as the real Florida. It's hard to stay ahead of the curve. Every time I write a scene that I think is the sickest thing I have ever dreame… ▶371LifeReadingThought
Carl HiaasenSometimes you're going to be faced with situations where the line isn't clear between what's right and what's wrong.Your heart will tell you to do one thing and your brain will te… ▶362LoveReadingThought
Carl HiaasenI think in the old days, the nexus of weirdness ran through Southern California, and to a degree New York City. I think it's changed so that every bizarre story in the country now… ▶375Thought
Carl HiaasenGarcia wondered why people with JESUS stickers on their bumper always drove twenty miles per hour under the speed limit. If God was my co-pilot, he thought, I'd be doing a hundred… ▶301HumanityThought
Carl HiaasenI don't have an e-reader. One reason is that I like to dog-ear the page when I find a particularly good sentence or passage.323Reading
Carl Hiaasen...Right now there's a pair of bad cops on their way out here to shoot me. You don't know that. Yeah, you're right, Stranahan said. They're probably just collecting Toys for Tots.… ▶324Life
Carl HiaasenNobody with an IQ higher than emergency-room temperature could ever believe that 'death panels' would be appointed to nudge the elderly toward euthanasia. Yet for idle entertainme… ▶314Death
Carl HiaasenThe evening news made her wonder if God was dead; the morning sun made her believe He wasn't. ✨ Carl Hiaasen (2006). Nature Girl, Random House Large Print Publishing369Death
Carl HiaasenThere is no writer's block in a newsroom. There's only unemployment block.3610Thought
Carl HiaasenThat's what people do when they find a special place that wild and full of life, they trample it to death. ✨ Carl Hiaasen (2014). Carl Hiaasen Collection: Hoot, Flush, Scat,… ▶3510DeathHumanityLife
Carl HiaasenDisney world is an armpit compared to Montana. ✨ Hoot. Book by Carl Hiaasen, 2002.284Reading
Carl HiaasenHere's my rule: You always want to pay cash for your own books, because if they look at the name on the credit card and then they look at the name on the book jacket, then there's… ▶339Reading
Carl HiaasenAs a lobbyist he had long ago concluded there was no difference in how Democrats and Republicans conducted the business of government. The game stayed the same: It was always abou… ▶307Politics
Carl HiaasenI've never progressed very far from my days as a smart aleck in middle school.286Humanity
Carl HiaasenI’m waiting for the day when Rush Limbaugh’s pharmacist writes a book.319Reading
Carl HiaasenSunset on the water ought to be a quiet and easy time, but I guess some people can't stand a little silence. ✨ Carl Hiaasen (2014). Carl Hiaasen Collection: Hoot, Flush, Sca… ▶319HumanityReadingTime
Carl HiaasenMy escape is to just get in a boat and disappear on the water.243Time
Carl HiaasenI'd always wanted to write books ever since I was a kid.244Reading
Carl HiaasenAs frightening as this may sound, what you see in the books is the way I see the world. And so far I haven't seen anything, either in Florida or elsewhere, to dissuade me from it.… ▶299Reading
Carl HiaasenYou can do the best research and be making the strongest intellectual argument, but if readers don't get past the third paragraph you've wasted your energy and valuable ink. 191ReadingTime
Carl HiaasenLike Richard Price and the late, great Elmore Leonard, Matt Burgess is one of those cool, quick and funny writers who can turn a seemingly routine crime caper into something speci… ▶202HumorReading
Carl HiaasenMrs. Bonneville never buckled her seat belt, even though it was required by state law; an ardent libertarian, she opposed government meddling in all matters of personal choice. 279Politics
Carl HiaasenI think it's always good for the author to stay a good cattle prod's distance from the actual moviemaking.215Thought
Carl HiaasenOne problem with age is that patience begins to ebb. ✨ Carl Hiaasen: 'My humour has always come from anger'. Interview with Euan Ferguson, www.theguardian.com. Mar… ▶193Death
Carl HiaasenNo deliberative body is manifestly less qualified to make decisions about public education than our state Legislature. With a few shining exceptions, most of these clowns don't re… ▶171PoliticsReading
Carl HiaasenMy books are shelved in different places, depending on the bookstore. Sometimes they can be found in the Mystery section, sometimes in the Humor department, and occasionally even … ▶249HumorReadingTime
Carl HiaasenDisney's something to be a little alarmed about. It's not just a little theme park anymore. It's now an ethic and outlook and strategy that goes way beyond central Florida.227Humanity
Carl HiaasenFrom my experience, politicians are much more uncomfortable being made fun of than they are being preached at and screeched at - you know, and the soapbox routine. They're much mo… ▶161LifePolitics
Carl HiaasenThat's the thing about being a Labrador retriever - you were born for fun. Seldom was your loopy, freewheeling mind cluttered by contemplation, and never at all by somber worry; e… ▶183HumanityLifeReading
Carl HiaasenThere's so much hate that we direct externally that we forget we have our own psychos. But that's the role of the satirist - you have to examine your own country and say, look! 206Thought
